Last night I sat across from a "newish" friend at dinner. We went out to eat and there were 6 of us in total. My newish friend and I rode together and we stayed so long, the two of us the closed the place. I honestly don't remember the last time I laughed so hard.
We went from 6 to 3 people after about 2 hours due to prior commitments. Once it was down to 3 of us, I literally went from hysterically laughing to tears pouring down my face from sadness. No joke. I have no idea how we went from one topic to another, but we did, and I can't get my mind off of it.
My friend was talking about a horrific tragedy that happened to her family. Horrific. Thankfully in the end it turned out okay, but the event that happened was beyond words. To this day her family and especially her daughter still are affected from the repercussions of what happened.
I had already known the story, but listening to her tell it really affected me.
If I put myself in her shoes, I wonder how I would have handled the situation. When struck with tragedy, would I cling to the Father or would I run in the opposite direction, denying Him.
I'd like to think I would never do the latter.
I'd like to think that.
I'd like to say I would wholeheartedly trust the Lord.
I'd like to say I wouldn't be angry with Him.
I'd like to tell you I would never forsake Him.
I'd like to tell you I would be as faithful to Him as He is to me.
But I can't.
I don't know what I would do. It would be easy for me to sit here and tell you I would trust. That would be easy, but tragedy is not easy. Tragedy is horrific. I think about my friend's story and I want to vomit just picturing it.
I don't know what I would do because I am a sinner.
But I do know one thing.
I have today. I have right now. I have the chance today to make the choice to cling to Him.
Because without Him?
I am nothing.